Giving Thanks

Some may think that it would be difficult for my family and I to find things to be thankful for this particular year. Quite the contrary. Even my mother, in her final days, was thankful and acknowledged how very blessed she was. Yesterday we had a lovely day filled with great food, loving family, and shared memories of those not with us. We ended our evening with karaoke. Sofia and I sang "our song," The Wind Beneath my Wings.

I am thankful for my family. These last few months have brought us closer than ever. The time spent with my mom, dad, and brother during the last days of mom's life was excruciatingly painful, but also brought with it an unbridled intimacy that comes only through shared tragedy, but will endure for our lifetime.

I am thankful for my father. His indomitable spirit and will to go on are an inspiration. I am thankful he has his health, and I look forward to welcoming him to San Diego as a permanent resident. I am thankful that my girls will know him as Grandpa, who makes coins appear out of ears, can ace any geography quiz, and is an amazing musician.

I am thankful for my brother, who I've grown to know as a fine man, a goofy uncle, and a terrific dad. I am thankful that I can now call him not only my brother, but also my friend.

I am thankful for my husband, who loves me unconditionally, with or without hair, or breasts, or energy. He's my biggest fan and largest supporter. He sits with me at chemo, encourages me to rest when I'm resisting. Has endless patience in managing the household and the girls on the days when I'm just not up to it. He's also a fine man, and my best friend.

I am thankful for my beautiful girls, who have embraced my experience as their own. Who encourage me to shed the wig to be comfortable. Who like to rub the peach fuzz on my bald head, sometimes even with wonderful smelling lotion. (More on that in a future post, The Benefits of Baldness.) Who proudly keep their friends up to date on the latest with mom. Who aren't afraid to say "Mom, why are you frustrated right now?" Then will listen intently as I share my feelings and return to the happy place.

I am thankful for my amazing friends, who really are an extension of my family. The thoughtful phone calls, endless meals, late night pep talks, shared tears, and love for my children are remarkable, unforgettable, and genuine.

There is so much more to be thankful for, but in the end it is the people we love, not the things we have. I am thankful because I know I am not alone, and will never be. I have my family and, by extension, my friends. I know now, more than ever, that in the end, at the end, family and friends are really all you've got. I am thankful, though bittersweet, to have learned this lesson early enough in life to cherish the important things and gain perspective on the rest.

Happy Thanksgiving to all.